A Years Supply Of Fairy Cakes
by Pastry Basis
Summary: Harry, Ron, and Hermione embark on a magical journey to find a years supply of pastries to defeat Voldemort and bring balance to the force.


**"A Years Supply Of Fairy Cakes"**

_**The Harry Potter Story Chapter 1: '**_

_**Pastry Plan' By: Kinsey Douglas**_

* * *

"What?" Harry asked Hermione, who always seemed to surpass him in knowledge and in streaks of days wearing hideous school overcoats.

"Fairy cakes," she replied positively, with a confident look on her face. "We need a year's supply of fairy cakes. It is the only thing that can keep Voldemort at bay."

Harry shook his head puzzled. Hermione had urged Harry and Ron to meet her out by the Forbidden Forest, preaching that she had found a way to disperse of Voldemort once and for all. Why she had to interrupt Harry while he was playing Tetris, was beyond him.

"I just don't see how that is going to solve our Voldemort problem, Hermione."

"Bloody hell, Harry! They're _magical _cakes. The fairy cakes are our only hope!" Ron yelled at Harry, just as he was about to complain.

"I agree Ron. They are our only hope for destroying Voldemort and bringing balance to the force!" she smiled at them both confidently.

Harry was taken aback. "The force? What in the world is the _'force'?_" He was obviously confused.

"The force is a strong unison that connects all pastries with wanna-be wizard nerds," Hermione recited from a textbook that she secretly held in her school robes. She had used it to baffle everyone around her and cheat on the wizard SAT's. Her parents had hired an overworked, overpaid Chinese pianist as her tutor. Hermione, who had become quite enraged at the fact that her parents had called her "A dumb slut who oughta work at McDonald's." No wait, that had been Latisha from New York, New York.

Harry Potter nodded slowly, trying to picture such a magical pastry in his mind. "Alright, Hermione. Where can we find such a pastry?" Harry asked, expecting her to be able to bake them with her Easy-Bake oven.

She smiled, happy that Harry was accepting her plot to keep Voldemort at bay. "Well, I have one with me…that way we can tell what they look lik-"

"Holy sorcerer's stones! Ron, You're eating the pastry!!!" She screamed, as both her and Harry turned to see Ron eating a bright pink, vanilla cup cake, with rainbow sprinkles.

"What?" Ron asked, while a sprinkle fell out of his mouth. "Don't be player-hating, Hermione."

"It's 'playa-hatin'', you dweeb!" Hagrid said with a frustrated tone in his voice as he stepped out of one of the bushes.

"Hagrid?" Harry asked, surprised that the 'giant' would choose to be in the Forbidden Forest at this time of night. Actually, he wasn't a giant anymore, for Hagrid had made the smart decision to switch to Weight Watchers. "Why are you out here?"

"Well, Harry. I heard your conversation. And, I think I may be able to help."

"Really, Hagrid?" Hermione asked, shocked that someone else knew of her plan to destroy Voldemort.

"Oh, don't look so surprised Hermione. I read it on your Twitter yesterday."

_**HERMIONE GRANGER'S UPDATES:**_

_1:10 P.M. 5/20/09_

_Planning on destroying the Dark Lord Voldemort. Not sure if Harry is up to it. I think the secret may be Elvan fairy cakes. _

_11:19 P.M. 5/19/09_

_Went to a Celine Dion concert today! I also bought the new Brittney Spear's song "If You Seek Voldie!" IN STORES NOW._

**NOT A USER? FOLLOW HERMIONE TODAY! JOIN!  
**

"Very nice profile picture, by the way Hermione," Hagrid said nicely.

"Yes, but they can't hire a well-trained programmer! The site KEEPS CRASHING…!"

Harry watched as Hermione began to spaz, as she checked that her number of follower's decreased. He turned to Hagrid. "So, you'll help us then?"

"I cannot help you on the journey, young wizard. But, I may be able to give you a shortcut." The former giant pulled out his Tom-Tom and pointed to its touch screen. "The quickest shortcut is to travel though Forks, Washington. You must then talk with Bella Swan, who has befriended the head fairy through MySpace. She will give you further directions."

Ron had just then systematically finished his cup cake, and walked into the middle of the group. "Alright, we can do this. We must, or risk letting Voldemort live!"

"I agree. How about you Harry, are you up for the challenge?" Hermione asked Harry, speaking in her "Who wants to be a millionaire" host-voice.

"I guess so…" Harry replied.

So, the gang of three set out on a magical adventure, in which they would experience many difficulties.

For Hermione, It would be PMS. For Harry, the fate of the world. And, lastly, for Ron, the shortage of cupcakes.

* * *

**Like it? Love it? Are you totally repulsed by it?**

**PLEASE REVIEW.**

**Also, note, I am no racist, If you are angry about my Latisha and Chinese pianist joke, please don't flame about it. **

**I Was kidding.**

**Also, The next chapter will be uploaded soon!**

**What will become of the wanna-be wizard nerds? Will the force be restored into balance? Will Voldemort be vanquished with pastries? Will Hagrid stick to Weight Watchers? Will I ever SHUT UP????**

**FIND OUT IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT OF 'A YEARS SUPPLY OF FAIRY CAKES'!**


End file.
